A few months ago, I read a book that really messed with my
head. It’s called The
Power of Less, by www.Zenhabits.net founder
Leo Babuta.
I say “messed with my head” because one of the theses of the
book is that we should never have more than one major goal that we’re working on.
Babuta gives multiple personal examples of how, by focusing on one thing at a
time until that thing was finished, he wrote a book, lost 30 pounds, and so on.
At any given moment, I typically have at least 3 major goals—in
each of the 7-8 businesses and organizations that I run or am involved in. The
idea of finding ONE thing that was so much more important than the other things
that I have to do that it was deserving of being put front-and-center in my
life at first made me mad (“Is he kidding? Who can get their goals list down to
one at a time? That’s not a way to live!!!!”).
And then it occurred to me that the fact that I was having
such a strong emotional reaction meant that I was probably getting some kind of
personal significance from having so many commitment, and since I’m trying to
detach from the idea that I am what I do, I decided to put aside my weird emotional
reaction and as the question “If there WERE one things, what would it be?”
It took 3 weeks and a 10 day vacation for the obvious answer
to dawn on me: my health, physical and mental, was the basis for everything
else, and therefore the “one thing”.
That led, a month later, to this project. But I have to be
honest with you: after just 10 days, I’m already swimming against the tide of
old habits. I have nearly talked myself out of going to the gym the last 2 days
in a row because, by focusing so much on my health (and blogging about it), I’ve
gotten more behind than usual on many of my tasks and projects. I’ve had the
thought more and more often that because I had a hard day, I “deserve” carb
binge. I’ve started having Negative Nelly attitudes about how this isn’t going
to work because it never works and I’m just doomed to die fat and soon.
But what’s kept me from putting fork to mouth or working through
the morning instead of getting to bootcamps has been 2 things: remembering that
this is my one thing, and knowing that I said that to the world and will have
to tell the world if I fail today.
Life is a series of times of balance and imbalance. Sometimes,
like when we’re facing an illness or a major life change, that imbalance is
involuntary. Sometimes, like when we really, really want to accomplish something
that’s hard but rewarding, we can choose the imbalance, and choose to deal with
the repercussions of that imbalance for a little while.
Wouldn't it be great if simply doing what you set out to do really was its own reward in these long, slow slogs toward a big goal? Unfortunately, it's not. I wake up every morning STILL not Wonder Woman strong and still not Cindy Crawford skinny, and the initial motivation and excitement has worn off, and yet I still have to do (or avoid doing) all kinds of stuff that I wouldn't in a more perfect world.
Which is why I've not succeeded in the past and why most people don't succeed at doing most things that are hard and take a long time. It's not a decision made and now behind me; it's one I'll make again tomorrow, and the next day, and 87 more days after that. It’s a daily struggle, and a daily choice to keep the main
thing the main thing.
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